


Enough

by cigaretteahegao



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Gen, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-02
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-15 12:55:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29808738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cigaretteahegao/pseuds/cigaretteahegao
Summary: Rey decides she cannot save him.
Relationships: Kylo Ren & Rey, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Enough

Ben Solo was looking rough-- everything from his facial expressions to his eyebags gave that away. He looked tired and cold. His vibe was almost aggressive, a hint of uncertainty washing over his face, his face remaining still and empty. It was the face of the man she saw under that mask the first time. He didn’t seem like the scared man she had come to know. 

As they stood looking at each other through the force, she carefully observed his location. It seemed dark, which was nothing new. She just assumed he was at a first order base. She stood in her room at the resistance-- alone, and not in the middle of anything. 

Rey hadn’t been a stranger to uncertainty. It seems like every portion of her life never remained clear, because deep down, she knew she could never get an answer. Maybe that's why she was still here-- fighting something for information she could never learn. Information she wasn’t even sure she still wanted. She got her answer. Even if it was from someone she should never let herself trust again. 

Yet this time, it felt forgien. As she looked him in the eye, something made her want to go with him. She almost wished she had taken his first offer. At least then she wouldn’t be sitting here, wondering if she could even still trust him. She wouldn’t be here, exhausting all her energy just to give up. That wasn’t who she was. 

They had already been through this game. They both try and convince each other that they believe there is something better for them. And then they never did. They could never seem to figure themselves out. There was always something holding them back. Sometimes it was fear. Sometimes it was pain. Sometimes it was each other. 

“I believe there is still good in you,” she spoke clearly, knowing that something was about to go wrong. She didn’t want to reject it. Something in her knew he was right. They could end it right here, and there would be no more conflict. The universe could have the balance it so desperately craved.   
She wanted to take his hand. She wanted to reach out, and take it, to take it and know that she at least could save someone. 

But that wasn’t enough. It hadn’t been enough in the throne room. It will never be enough. The look in his eyes almost made that certain. She couldn’t just save someone who didn’t want to be saved. 

His gaze was intense, locking his eyes with hers, the light and dark pulling at both of them. In that instance, she knew what she had to do. She knew the only solution to this issue was simple-- she had to stop holding on.

Kylo Ren was nothing if he wasn’t stubborn. He was stubborn, and tragic. And he wasn’t going to turn. At some point she needed to realize that she just had to give up hope. Leia may have believed in seeing hope even when it wasn’t there-- but she couldn’t do it.   
She wasn’t Leia. Leia would have stood here, and knocked some sense into Ben, without all the other complicated issues. She would have stood here, and been able to take on the world.

“You don’t want to change, Ben” She was tired of waiting for people. Even if she still wanted to. She wanted to sit here and pretend that her parents were coming back, that Ben was going to turn, that she was capable of saving the people she cared about. “That has always been your problem,”

Rey didn’t feel like she was though, and that was the issue here. Her emotions got in the way. For Ben, that was an asset. He could channel his rage, and use it. When she was angry and hopeless? It was nothing but a weakness. It was a target and something to be used and manipulated. She would just become another pawn in the sith, exploited by her pain. So she shoved it down. She ignored it and moved on, because there wasn’t much else she could do. Her empathy was one of her greatest weaknesses, and it would be her downfall.

“I can’t help you,” The Jedi was walking out now, turning right on her heels and rushing out, her fingers lightly tracing on the saber that resided next to her. She didn’t like the idea of doing this. It felt cruel. It felt like she was putting him in the same situation her parents did. He was alone-- helplessly alone. 

Her hand was still on her weapon, ready to attack if needed. She turned her head back, locking eyes with the man she had just abandoned. Something in her seemed to drop, her eyes turned sympathetic but not regretful. 

She had a feeling that the situation felt familiar to him. Yet this was not a situation where he had no control in. He wanted this. He wanted for her to give up hope-- to leave and let emotions fester. 

“I don’t need your help,”

With that comment alone, she left before she could get caught. Before yet another fight that she couldn’t win. It wasn’t one she could take. It was a failure in its purest sense. And it seemed, maybe, just maybe, it was not his fault. 

She was not enough.


End file.
